I once saw a shadow dash across the wall. It had half a body and tiny legs. I was terrified. It looked like a waddling potato. There was no mistaking the terror which had befallen my jiggling soul; I had been visited by the waddling shadow potato man.
This one time I was going to my car in a parking lot. It was late at night and there were no lites. I started to open my car door but a security guard came out of the mall (this was a mall parking lot, guys, which is why it was dark. they turned off the lights) and said:
Nooooo! Don’t get in the car!!!!
Oh my god, I said. I heard an email about this. Is the killer in my car?
The security guard smiled and I could see fangs so I was scared.
No, he said. I AM THE KILLER!
I used to have this pair of pants. I loved those pants. I didn’t like to wear anything else. I wore no socks. I wore no shirt. I wore no underwear. I only wore my pants. My mom told me they were dirty. My mom said she wanted to wash them. I said NO! My pants did not get washed. My pants got all kinds of food on them. My pants got all kinds of dirt and stains on them. I would not wash them.
One day I woke up and I was naked. My pants had taken themselves off me. They were moving and walking on their own. I tried to attack them, but was repelled by the smell of them. I had worn them for months and my pants had become very stinky.
My stinky pants got out of my window and went around the neighborhood and killed everyone they found. They killed robbers and joggers and homeless people and whoever else was out at three in the morning. I could not go stop them because I had no other clothes to wear.
My stinky pants killed everyone on my block. My stinky pants killed everyone in my city. The other day my stinky pants called and said they are coming to your town.
They are looking for you. They won’t kill you right away. They will make you wear them first.
Crap! She seen me looking in her window. I need to move before she call the cops.
Hey! You got nice windows.
when u kill a spiders and bunches of tiny little spiders run off, each one of those little baby spiders is a fragment of the original spiders that will grow into bigger spiders and hunt u down forevers